Showing posts with label Becky. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Becky. Show all posts

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Does He Know You Too Well?

No, I'm not talking about your significant other...I'm talking about the Asian Bistro Delivery guy. And I'm also talking about Mona, not myself, of course. And the answer is yes, yes he does know us too well. 

This new Asian Bistro place opened up about a month ago and we all love it.  We may order delivery once or twice or more a week between us. Is that a sin? 

The first warning sign that we might be eating it a little bit to much was when I order it for dinner and the delivery guy said, "Oh, this is the second time he's been here today." Do you know how if feels to have those words sound when they are spoken directly to your face by the Asian Bistro Delivery Guy?!? He made me sound like a pig, that's what it feels like. It's extremely offensive is what it is! That's not how you want your delivery guy to make you feel! See if I order from the Asian Bistro again! See if I ever open this door again!! See if I ever give you a tip again, Mister Mouthy!!! Okay, okay, so maybe I gave him the same amount of tip I always give him. I didn't go completely crazy. He does control my main food source. What's that saying..."don't bit the hand that feeds you." So, I tipped the guy and swore up and down it wasn't me, but I'm still not sure he really believed me. 

Then yesterday Mona was at my parents house (we crash there all of Shark Week, because we are too cheap to pay for Discovery Channel) and she messages Becky and I on our Facebook Biffs chat:

Mona: "Oh you are at a different house today" Be proud, not ashamed, Mona!!! HE KNOW ME! My response "I'm not afraid, to eat Asian. Everyday of my life"

Becky: What? Are you talking to yourself again?

Mona: No. That is what the delivery guy said "different house today"

Becky: Ohhhh lol embarrassinggg...

Mona: No.

Me: At least you're unforgettable. Too bad it's not that first super cute one that remembers you. (I’m ashamed to admit I know exactly what delivery guy she is referring to)

Mona: That would be worse. I couldn't handle that.

Me: You’re right. You would probably stop ordering Asian takeout if that happened.

Becky: That’s impossible! You wouldn't give up Asian takeout!

Me: You underestimate her awkwardness with the opposite sex.

Mona: Thank you Luna.

So, you may say he knows us a little to well if he recognizes Mona outside of our home. Honestly, I think he sees Mona more than I see Mona. Oh, I wonder if she stared dating him we could get free Asian Bistro? I mean we'd at least get a discount, right? At the very least we'd get our two dollar delivery charge waved. 

Friday, June 13, 2014

Matchmaking

Becky: Martha said their new neighbor has a life sized TARDIS in their backyard!! Which she described as
"that big blue thing from that show". She said she would walk over with me and ask if I can take a pic in it.

Mona: You are such a nerd. If the neighbor man is single introduce him to Luna...actually DON'T!

Me: I think I'm offended! I don't know if it's more because you want to set me up or because you don't want me to date a nerdy man because I know you are thinking it will make me nerdier than I already am...

Mona:....yes.

Me: humph!

Becky: I just don't know if I want Luna to be with a nerdy man or the opposite of her?

Me: I'm not actually that nerdy of a person, I could meet a guy who is REALLY nerdy and we still wouldn't be the exact same.

Mona: You WILL become that much of a nerd.

Becky: It would just pull you deeper into your neediness.

Me: Is that a bad thing?

Mona: Yes.

Me: That's not very nice.

Mona: I like how she didn't say no to anything! She wants a man.

Becky: And she wants us to find her one!

Me: No. That is not the case whatsoever!

Mona: OMGGGG! You are so right Becky! Shall we begin?

Me: NO! NO! NO! NO!!!!!

Mona: Challenge accepted!

Me: Dear lord NO!

Friday, May 2, 2014

Famdamly Convo

After reading my post from yesterday, Mom was a little concerned for my emotional well being. This conversation took place in our “Famdamly” ongoing convo on Facebook.

(Please note that this conversation has been edited for ease of reading. We go off topic and respond late and back track and misuse words and spellings constantly. Plus nobody understands what Mom’s saying half the time, so I cut out all the really confusing parts.)

FAMDAMLY:

Mom: Luna is an emotional mess..she needs her hormones checked PLEASE...I am worried about your females… (she is referring to the fact that I haven’t had my period in a few months and there is no way whatsoever I am pregnant. I have a really have a hard time wanting to go to the doctor for NOT bleeding for days. It’s just not at the top of my priorities list.) Luna is a mess!

Me: I'm fine now that I cried

Mom: No you ain't...must go to doctor....otherwise you are like Nancy thinking you don't need doctors (Nancy, our friend, drank raw milk and didn't go to the doctor for years so she basically had to get ALL of her woman parts removed)
Me: It's just PMS I'll probably be getting it this weekend. I'm fine…

Mom: It isn't normal not to have for that long....I could see if you were training for the Olympics....just saying! lolol I don't want these emotions up north (we are going on vacation to our family’s cottage in two weeks). Gma and I have both had problems.....

Mona: Many {referring to Mom’s many problems}

Me: But I am training for the Olympics! That is why!

Mom: Excuse me, Mona, my problems!?! Doris (Code for Mona's uterus) is the worst with all those dirty looks and snarls!

Mona: She hasn't been bad!

Becky: Wait! Mona am I uninvited because I have Doris?? {yes, Becky’s coming with us on vacation} I will keep Doris in check!

Mona: Becky. If you promise to keep her in line you can come lolol.

Mom: Mona, you don't see her in a real light like the rest of us! She is nasty! {referring to Mona’s Doris}

Becky: Are we talking about Luna? lololol (If I wasn't away from my computer stopping a flood at this moment I would have responded to this with a “How dare you say this about me Becky! You better sleep with one eye open this vacation!” But like I said, I was stopping a flood and this comment went refuted. Thanks for standing up for me mom.)

Becky:
 It's probably because you don't have a liver. {referring to my gallbladder and liver problems from a few weeks ago}
Mom: Her liver is still functioning.....

Becky: No, they had to remove it surgically and they replaced it with another uterus which explains everything

Mona: Ohhhhhhhhhhhh double Doris! Ooo double Doris....I don't want that.


Mom: Becky...please don't give medical advice to patients {Becky is a receptionist at the same hospital I work for}

Mona:
That is her job. She is a doctor.

Mom: Dr. Dread

Mona: Becky is a Doctor and Luna is training for the Olympics?! Wow we have some classy folk. I feel like a bit of a loser (Again, if I wasn't dealing with a flood, I would have said some hilarious snarky comment about her actually being a loser)

Mom: See that's why I don’t want to go up north......her training for the Olympics could be rough.......she may want us doing it with her

Dad: I think I'll just go myself

Mona: Every time Luna has Doris we say "Luna is training for the Olympics" Change approved?

Becky: I like it. Change approved!

Mona: Hahaha

Luna: I step away to get coffee and deal with a flood and this is what happens! (okay, so I might have really been getting coffee and chitchatting while watching them clean up an overflowing sink). What happened to my body? I didn't get where you were going with that bit.

Mona: Yeah you had to remove it surgically and they replaced it with another uterus which explains everything

Me: Oh okay. So, you are saying they took out my well working uterus and surgically replaced it with a defective one?

Becky: No they took out your liver and you now have two uterus'

Me: Wait. Why did they replace my liver with a uterus?

Becky: I don't have time to explain science to you Luna.

Mona: Dumb jocks…

Me: I think I take offence to the dumb jocks comment.

Becky: Dumb Olympians

Me: Much better. Thank you.

Thursday, April 17, 2014

My Whole Stupid Family Almost Died Last Night

My whole stupid family almost died on my last night.

And they didn't even tell me about it!!!

I'm scrolling through Facebook this morning and I come across a post from Mom:




I've mentioned before that Mona, Becky and I have a BIFFS group chat going on Facebook, while we also have a Famdamly chat going with Me, Mom, Dad, Mona and our honorary family member Becky. So I messed them right away.


Me: What where you guys doing last night?!?

Becky: sucking gas

Mom: Trying to see Jesus

Dad: I had to Dave the family from the grip of death. Somehow the gas stove was left on with no flame.
       
Save not Dave

Becky: thanks for daving us

Me: I don't think you guys should be left alone on Wednesday nights anymore (Mona, Becky and I go over to Mom and Dad's on Wednesday night and eat food. Mona and Becky spend the night and I go home to sleep in my own bed).

Nothing but deathly trouble every week.

Mom: Oh yeah the fire last week (last Wednesday their neighbor's house caught on Fire)...
           
Maybe you should stay from now on
   
Me: Do you all have wills drawn up

Mom: Never had a will. ..

Me:
If you guys are going to try dying on me I think you should

Dad: Yes everything goes to my favorite daughter

Me: Yes, me, but if I could get that in writing

Mom: Probably should so you two don't fight over all or millions. . 
         
But you would've got it all. It was a serious thing. 
         
Upon reading you usually just don't wake up

Me: I KNOW!

Becky, you could also put me in your will if you would like

Becky: want my IPAD and TV? that's about all I have to give lol

Me: And any remaining money in your bank account. You may not have any now, but who knows if you die many years down the road and have money saved and didn't realize you didn't change your will for your husband and kids....I will get all of your money

Becky: And you can cash in my PTO (paid time off…we work together) or use it for vaca

Me: Hum...can you will someone your PTO?

Dad? Do you think you could do that? (Dad works in upper management in for our company)

I bet we can talk to a union rep...

Becky: If its in my will they can't deny it

Me: “My very last and greatest wish is that Luna get all of my PTO.”

Becky: I'll stop taking time off so it will grow and you will never have to worry about a day off in your life

Me: Thank you Becky

Dad: I'm pretty sure Luna’s going first, health u know

After awhile Mona decided to join. She doesn't work until two, so she misses out on most of our early morning chats. 

Mona: This is an interesting chat to catch up on!
   
Don't sign your Will over to Luna, she will murder you all

Mom: Agreed and we won't even know is happening

Becky: OMG! This is all part of her arch enemy (Yesterday we were watching Sherlock and they were talking about having arch enemies, so Becky and I decided to become each others)

Mom: Thanks Becky we were just collateral damage

Mona: She is the one who left the gas running. Luna, how could you do this to me! do you just want my $1,000ish money in my savings?

Mom:
You guys have seen our banking

Me: Mona…
       
Way to ruin my plan.
       
And maybe I took some life insurance out on you guys as well
       
I mean don't listen to her!
       
She lies!

Mona: Luna, I thought you would include me in your plan...not "INCLUDE ME" in your plan!

Me: Mona you were giving me grief yesterday

Mona: I give you grief every day!

Becky: Luna I have nothing to offer you!

Mona: Except sweet sweet victory. It is all about the mind game!

Mom: It's really Becky she's in on it cuzz she got no money
         
She made up this nemesis story to trick us. . She pretended to be dead when I stared into her face listening for breath

Me: Becky isn't that clever

Mona: lol

Becky: Yes I am!

Mona: Oooo....good comeback

Becky: Thanks lol (I'm not sure if Becky caught the sarcasm in Mona's comment or if she actually took that as a compliment) 

All of our devious arch enemy plans aside, there was one thing bothering me...
I HAD TO FIND THIS OUT ON A FACEBOOK POST!!!!

Me: What I want to know Becky is why didn't you mention the fact that you all almost died when I talked to you at work this morning

Becky: near deaths happen to me all the time i'm used to it

Me: All my attempt at on your life my nemesis

Mona: you didn't ask if she almost died, that's why she didn't tell you

Becky: lol true you should have said "Becky how are you this morning? any near deaths?"

Me: Okay I'll start asking if there were any near death experiences since we parted last

Next we had to talk about all the symptoms of gas inhalation they were experiencing. 

Becky: I've feeling like i have to puke all day i hope i'm not dying from the gas
         
 Have you guys been feeling sick??

Mona; I feel kinda pukee

Becky: really?? so do i
           
its either the gas or the scones or the lack of Happy Endings (the tv show mom forgot to tape for us)

Mona: all of the above
           
I've pooped like 3 times already

Mom: I have a massive headache...we are ok its just what sometimes happens...should all be better tomorrow
           
Headache and nausea are the symptoms

Becky: i hope i didn't get brain damage

Mom: Nope just headache nausea or you don’t wake up
         
So if you two are puky I am headachy its was a miracle we are alive...

Mona: And I am poopie...don't forget about that!

Mom: That's good...leaving system.....let it flow let it flow (like frozen song)

Mona: That could be a PMS song too "Let it flow let it flow"

I wish I could say those last few lines were symptoms of the brain damage, but sadly they are not. 

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Google Glass

Okay, I know I posed something already today, but this is major!

I COULD BUY GOOLE GLASS TODAY!!!!! And become an explorer....

Because Mona and I are trying to open a coffee shop we are trying to keep a tight reign on our money spending, but she opened up the door for spending...



Mona: really want to go get my tattoo.

Becky: what are you getting?? when??

Me: if you get a tattoo, can I buy google glass?

Mona: Because it is obviously the same price Luna...
I want to get "it is well" on my forearm under my elbow crease

Me: well...it's the first and only day they are available for the public.

Becky: how much are they?

Me: $1500
https://glass.google.com/getglass/shop/glass

Becky: worth it

Mona: Give me 5 reasons as to why that would be a good idea for our future business

Becky: you could be looking at recipes while you make coffee

Me:
1. we can work more efficiently, hands free while we work

2. we will show to be ahead of the times, therefore people will trust our business sense.

3. we will look cool, therefore people will like us and come to our business.

4. it will be a good conversation starter "hey you have google glass!!?" "Yes, I bought them to help with my coffee shop, come join me"

5. I would be one of the fist public people to have google glass and can train to start giving lessons when they are officially released to the public and make us money to open the coffee shop

Becky: all valid reasons

Me: thank you Becky.

Mona: Okay

Me: Really?!!? Because their tag line is "become an explorer" Mona I want to become an explorer.

Mona: If you think it will be beneficial. (I imagine this said with a snotty, know it all, manipulative, disapproving voice)

Me: I feel like you are saying "okay, if you think it will be beneficial", but I feel like you don't really believe it will be beneficial.

Becky: I don't think she thinks you are going to get it lol


Me: challenge accepted!

Friday, April 4, 2014

A Day In Luna's Life

Okay, so this is kinda a long post. I was reading Life Changes’s post, called A Day In My Life, yesterday and thought it would be fun to write about a day in my life! (crazy weird jump...I know).


A Day In Luna’s Life


Waking Up
My alarm clock, that is five minutes fast and constantly giving me trouble, blares at 6:00 A.M. every morning. I shut it off, open my eyes, giving it the evil eye. I turn the other way and also shut off the fan on my headboard book stand thingy (you know what I’m talking about), and roll out from my bed and tangle of pillows and blankets.


I trudge through the junk scattered on the bedroom floor in the dark, my room darkening drapes not letting an ounce of light in. I try to keep quiet as Mona is sleeping in the same room.


Zombie-like I grab my shower stuff and head to the bathroom, most of the time I forget how to shower and stand looking at the shampoo for awhile before I remember what I’m suppose to do with it.


After showering I put my pajamas back on (because ten-to-one I forget to grab my robe in the left in the bedroom) and go back into the bedroom, flip on the light, look over at Mona to make sure I didn’t wake her up, grab what I need and shut the door as I tiptoe out. Down the first flight of stairs, I drop my phone off on the bar in the kitchen to make my trek down another flight of stairs to the basement.


I grab something that resembles an appropriate work outfit from among the piles of unfolded, and somehow clean clothing (because I hate to do laundry) and put it on. Every time I think, tonight I will organize this laundry room, so my roommates don’t grow to hate me because of it,  and every night I don’t do it. It’s a vicious cycle.


Once I’m back up to our main level I head into the bathroom. I put my makeup on in 5 minutes with my eyes basically closed. Then I say to myself that I’m styling my hair by turning on the blow dryer just to the point it stops dripping and doing nothing else. If it looks too terrible I throw it up in a sloppy, partially wet ponytail and call it a day.


If I’m done exceptionally early I plop down in the recliner in the living room and scroll through social media.  

I have an alarm set for when I need to absolutely leave the house or I will be late. As soon as that goes off, I put on my shoes. The same pair of shoes everyday. My red Chucks. Once slipping those on, I put on my winter coat, yes they may be calling it “spring” here in Wisconsin, but it doesn’t look or feel anything like spring.

I grab my purse, keys, name-tag, which are usually left my the front door, and make sure I have my phone before I head out the door.


Once I walk outside and before I shut and lock the door I double check to make sure I have my purse, keys, name-tag, and phone. I can be absentminded and forget any or all of these things at any given point. I have probably spent more time looking for my lost phone than actually using it.


As I walk out to the parking lot of my apartment building I see that once again my neighbor is parked in my extra parking stall. I know we don’t always use it, but it still irks me that they think they have a right to park in my empty spot. I glare at my the car the entire time that I’m getting in mine. I think about the nasty letter I will write and put on their windshield. I have yet to write note.


I drive to work in silence. I don’t know if I’m still partly asleep or lost in my thoughts, but I don’t even realize I didn't turn on the radio until it’s too late to even bother.


Work
I park in the farthest spot from the building, the same spot every time, so I don’t forget where I parked. And sit for a minute just looking at the building thinking “do I really have to go in?”, the answer is always and unfortunately “yes”.


I walk across the parking lot and into the building. I get to my desk, clock in, unlock doors and drawers, and log into my computer and see what I've got going on for today. If you don’t know, I work for a large medical facility. I’m the receptionist for Physical and Occupational Therapy, Orthotics, and Prosthetics Departments (and yes I have to say all that every time I answer the phone).


I get into work at 7:00 am.  It’s my favorite time to be at work. Most people don’t start until eight, including my partner, so it feels like I have the place to myself.  I love the feeling of a big empty building. The silence and darkness of a normally bustling place. It’s got an eerie quiet quality about it that I find comforting.


I get all of my busy work done and wait for the building to come to life. My partner usually clocks in just before 8:00 nearly giving me a heart attack because she is so close to being fired for being late, I yell at her every time.


The Urgent Care reception desk is right next to ours. I love the receptionist dearly, but she also can’t make it to work on time to save her life.  She works by herself, so when she’s late, I have to take over the responsibilities of her work on top of my own.  I set my jaw and forward her phones to my desk and take care of all of her patients. Lately she has been almost an hour late everyday. She has FMLA (a law that says you can’t be fired because of medical problems) for headaches, asthma, and depression that she uses and abuses. I have asthma too, but I still manage to make it to work on time and I’m here running around doing her job on top of it. You should see me trying to catch my breath as I run back and forth. I get that every now and then you need to come in late, but this is EVERY DAY!! (I’m not sore about it at all)


Whenever she decides to show things calm down and my partner and I get our work into a normal routine. This consists of actually working, browsing the internet when we are slow, me goofing off with Kari (one of the therapists) when she is slow (Don’t tell anyone, but Kari is my favorite), trying not to get people mad enough to threaten my life, and fending off people trying to get me to go out with Charles. It’s rough work.


Lunch
Around noon I take my lunch. I bundle up and walk to the diner across the street. I get a booth and take my book. Right now I’m reading The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt. The girls at the diner know me and bring me my diet coke right away. I sit and eat and read. Sometimes I even let the girls talk me into getting a piece of pie.


After an hour, I tear myself away from my book and walk back to work.


Only three hours left.  


I count down until 4:00.


After Work
Depending on the day and how I’m feeling I can do different things.


My set days are Tuesdays and Wednesdays.


Tuesdays, I normally go and see a movie with my dad. There’s a special where you get your movie, large popcorn, and a soda for $10 and we take turns buying. Afterwards we stand in the lobby or outside (depending on the weather) and talk for awhile about the movie and life.

And Wednesdays, Mona, Becky, and I go over to my parents house for dinner. Mom always cooks and we eat. We talk and watch cable TV shows that we don’t get. Mona and Becky normally spend the night, but I go home to sleep in my own bed. I hate trying to get ready for work in the morning at someone else’s house and I don’t want to wake up any earlier than I have to to drive home and get ready.


Days that are not Tuesdays or Wednesdays differ depending on a lot of different things.


On the nights Mona isn't working we normally eat dinner together and find something to do, like going to a coffee shop or writing music.


On the nights Mona is working, I act like an old lady. I pick up fast food on my way home from work at 4:00 because I don’t like to cook and I don’t want to have to go back out later and get something. Then I plant myself in the recliner and binge watch Netflix. Sometime Becky joins me, right now we are watching Dexter together and love it (we are only on season 4, so no spoilers please).


When Becky’s there we try and get in as many episodes of Dexter that we can until Mona gets home. We started the first episode without without Mona and she got mad and refused to catch up and watch it with us. She still gets mad when she catches us watching, so we try to have it shut off by the time she walks in the door. Becky and I  always look guilty so she knows.


When Becky doesn't come over I try and stay up until Mona gets home, so we can talk or write music or watch a TV show together, but I don’t always make it. 10 o’clock is just too late some nights.


Bedtime
The way I get ready for bed is to throw on my pajamas, think about washing my face, and don’t. because I’m too lazy. And crash into my bed. I bury myself in with lots of blankets and pillows. I turn on my fan and set my alarm to be ready to get up and do it all over again…


After writing this, I see myself as a very lazy person who watches way too much TV. In my defense I do do other things sometimes! Just not all the time.

What does a normal day look like for you?

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Classy Drama? Is There Such A Thing?

I don't know if you guys have seen or heard of the show Gossip Girls. It was really popular a few years ago. Well, my friend, Becky, is a huge fan. Because Becky liked it so much Mona has recently started watching it on Netflix. I have held out on principle, the principle of it sounding like a dumb show. All Becky wanted to do when she watched it was eat macaroons and, now that Mona's watching it, they will say things to me like "L" was spotted reading a book...wonder where she got it? and "L" was spotted talking to "C" while she was at out and about yesterday...what were they up to? I don't even know what they are trying to say half the time, but it sounds dumb. 

Well, anyways, this morning Mona sends this message via our Biffs chat: 

Mona: Sometimes when I get in a Netflix streak and live through Gossip Girls drama. I have to tell myself to "put Netflix away and go make your own drama. Or at least get out of the house. This excitement doesn't happen with them by sleeping all day watching tv!"

Becky: no it does not!
go sleep with someones bf right now!
or go to a ball or something

Mona: I'm on it...I may have to shower first
Where do I find these people?
I don't think anyone in this town is classy enough for this kind of thing!

Becky: ummm lets just plan on going to the ball with your mother (The ball is a work thing for charity. Bekcy, Mona, Dad, and I all work for the Hospital that throws the ball and Dad goes every year with Mom)

Me: If you're looking for classy drama, i don’t' think you are going to find it in this town.

Becky: our first challenge is to get an invite

Mona: Challenge accepted!

Me: You can buy a ticket to the ball

Mona: ....I mean we could buy tickets but they are like 200

Becky: we will prolly need to seduce someone who has a ticket

Mona: I got chu!
I can probably get the roster of who all is invited

Becky: then eat macaroons and pick out dresses
with our parent's credit card of course

Me: I think all hospital employees are invited

Mona: We might have to wait 8-10 business days for the credit card thing....
My parents got stolen

Bekay: whaaaaat??
this is getting scandalous
Luna would you like to attend?

Luna: no

Mona: Luuunnnaaa!

Bekcy: yes you do!

Mona: She will be going

Becky: sorr Luna you’re in

Me:







Mona:
How are we going to get a ticket for her? ....maybe seduce through email!
Luna prolly already has a date....
With...
C
H
U
C

Me: SHUT UP

Mona: K
Y

Me: No. I do not, nor would I.

Mona: If you don't yet Luna...here is how you get chucky! http://allwomenstalk.com/10-tips-on-how-to-seduce-a-man-on-a-date
I've been studying up

Me: This is not how to get a date...this is when you are already on the date...
bahahah...be prepared.

Mona: This could also be in the work place

Me: Be prepared with a condom in the work place? I don't think that would fly at work...

Becky: lol
i think that is totally fine
tell Chucky to get a tux

Me: no.

Becky: do it! i'll just ask him

Mona: You should handle it Becky

Becky: i will take care of the situation


Me: No.

Thursday, January 30, 2014

The Forehead Games

Yesterday, as I was leaving the house to go to work, I put on my hat, because it was a gazillion degrees below zero, and Mona started to point and hysterically laugh at me.

Mona: Your forehead!

Me: What about my forehead?

Me: You look like yourself when you were a baby. A bald little baby. Gah, I can't get over it. Try pulling your hat up to show some of your hair.

I pull my hat down over my eyebrows, because I always do the opposite of what Mona tells me to do.

Mona: Come on, pull it back.

So, I pull my hat back.

Mona: Do you have a fivehead?

She starts walking towards me with her hand held out to measure the length of my, apparently large, forehead.

Mona: Yep, I think it's a fivehead.

Me: Thanks.

Mona: You have a very distinctive forehead.

Me: Yeah right.

Mona: No, really, I could tell that forehead anywhere.

Me: You will have to prove this later, I'm going to be late for work.

So later that night I put her to the test over our Biffs conversation (an all day, everyday Facebook chat between Mona, Becky, and I).

With out any topic introduction I posted this:











Becky: Who is that? Me?

Mona: That is not Luna's forehead

Me:












Mona: Not a Luna Forehead

Becky: Oh that's def a Luna Forehead lol

Me: 

















Becky: I love this game!! I'm thinking you are finding random images on Google am I right?

Mona: Not a Luna

Me:










Mona: Nope

Me:










Becky: Are you playing the spotted game?? I knew you liked Gossip Girl (Side Note: they have been trying to get me to watch Gossip Girl and I will have nothing to do with it based on the pure stupidity of it)

Mona: Not Luna. I told her that she has a distinct forehead

Becky: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Not Luna.

Me:





Mona: Nope.

Me:









Mona: LUNA!!

Me:






Mona: Nope.

Me:


Mona: That is really tiny, but no.

Me:









Mona: Nope.

Me: Wrong.

Mona: Oh no. I had a second of doubt then I said nope. Darn it. Now I see it

Me: Okay, I'm going to give you one ore chance to win. This is double or nothing.



 Mona: Both

Me: Is that your final answer?

Mona: Yes.

Me: You are correct!! You missed one out of four Luna Foreheads. Not bad.


I'll have to admit Mona better than I thought she would, especially since I was pulling from all my pictures, the last one was even of me as a baby. I guess Mona was right when she said that with a hat on my forehead looked like me as my bald baby self. 

What about you? Could you tell your friends and family by their foreheads? 

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Sleeping Problems

I know I've been talking about this a lot, but when someone interrupts my sleep it is a great sin against humanity and therefore must be documented so they can properly pay for their evil transgressions and ungodliness in the afterlife.

 I told you how Mona and I are sharing a room to save money, while it took me a minute to get used to sharing a room, but I've been doing fine. I turn on my little fan to drown out the noises of the TV she watches late at night and everything is good.

Last night was not so good.

Over the last three days I have been with people non stop. My introverted self was exhausted. Last night, after The Bachelor recording cut off half way through the show, I left Mona to entertain and said goodnight to our guests.

Peace at last. My head was pounding (a strange side effect of being with people too long...not that I hate people..they just make me tired and literally give me a headache) and I was ready for sleep.

Around midnight the lights of my bedroom turn on and Mona and Becky come clattering in chattering away like there wasn't another person sleeping in the room who had to be up in a few hours for work.

They left the lights on and continued to cackle away.

I, thinking they would grow tired and go to bed, let it go on until one o'clock in the morning. I was exhausted and cranky from being woken up. I didn't have the energy to lift my head and give them a proper talking to, so I sent a text to Mona.

Me: This is not ok.

Mona: You said you can't hear anything with the fan.

Me: The lights are on and you are loud.

Mona jumped up quick and turned out the lights. Her and Becky started to snicker and they used the lights from their phones to make shadow puppets on the wall above my head.

I was not amused. I was ready to jump up, grab them by the hair, and throw them down the stairs (did I mention I have very violent thoughts in this state). I exercised my powers of restraint and sent a text message instead.

Me: You need to stop or get out.

They finally shut up and stopped messing around. It was for their own well being.

Now that it's morning and I have finished my first cup of coffee, I realize, again, that I have a problem. There is not way to fix it, I'm not in control. The only way to stop this from happening is if people learn to stop waking me up while I'm sleeping.

WARNING: DO NOT WAKE LUNA UP EVER or you will suffer her extreme wrath.

I worry for the safety of my unborn children.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Another Post About Charles

Okay, do you remember back in November when I accidentally went on a date with Charles to see The Hunger Games? And then how I tried everything in my power to convince myself it wasn't a date? (It really wasn't)

Well, yesterday. Dad really wanted to see The Hunger Games and, because nobody would go with him and he didn't want to go alone, I said I would go with him.

I posted on Facebook: Hunger Games for a third time? Why not. 

The first reply that I got was: Good idea, I might have to try that. From Charles.

With in two seconds of him posting this I got harassing messages from my family and friends (who still insist it was a date) saying he was basically begging to go with me.

Normally if anyone posted something like this, I would be all "HEY! COME WITH US!" 

But instead I said: It may seem obsessive, but I'm okay with it.

What kind of lameness is that? I didn't want to ignore him and I didn't want my family to mock me more, so that's the best I could come up with on short notice. But, in my defense, saying "do you want to go out with me and my daddy?" didn't seem like the best option either. Just because I can write a blog, doesn't guarantee I can come up with good stuff to say on the spot that requires real life social skills.

When Dad picked me up for the movie he said he was going to post something on my status about asking Charles if he wanted him to bow out so Charles and I go to the movie alone.

I WOULD HAVE KILLED HIM!

I know he likes to try and embarrass me (it's a sport of his), but that would have been crossing a line.

On a normal day this would have been upsetting and awkward enough, but earlier that day I found out that Becky, who works in the same Clinic as I do, has been referring to Charles as my boyfriend to the entire second floor!

I was training another girl, Jackie, who normally works on the second floor. Charles comes out to the front desk to say hi and as soon as he leaves Jackie turns to me and says "Oh, so that is your boyfriend"

Two seconds later this conversation took place:


Me: Becky. WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN TELLING JACKIE ABOUT ME!?!


Becky: Umm lots of stuff lol she sits by me every day...we share. I might or might not have said you and her son would be cute together


Me: Not that.


Becky: Oh lol then what are you talking about? Charles?


Me: The first time Charles walks out here she says “so that’s your boyfriend?” Not in front of him thankfully!


Becky: ...this is awkward.


Me: What do you have to say for yourself?


Becky: I’m ashamed


Me: What exactly have you been telling people?


Becky: I swear I have just told her that I’m trying to set you up with him, but Kayla and I kinda refer to him as your bf so I can seeeeee some people taking it the wrong way


Me: I hate you.


Becky: I didn't mean to!!!!!


Me: Yes you did.


Becky: I will simmer it down


Me: You will shut it down.


Becky: Fine. Consider Operation Luna’s Prosthetic Heart shut down. (Charles works in the Prosthetics department, in case you didn't know why Becky thinks she funny)


Me: That’s what you've been calling it?


Becky: I just thought of it. Genius I know.

Me: No.

I think I need to find me some new friends and family.