Does He Know You Too Well?

No, I'm not talking about your significant other...I'm talking about the Asian Bistro Delivery guy. And I'm also talking about Mona, not myself, of course. And the answer is yes, yes he does know us too well. 

This new Asian Bistro place opened up about a month ago and we all love it.  We may order delivery once or twice or more a week between us. Is that a sin? 

The first warning sign that we might be eating it a little bit to much was when I order it for dinner and the delivery guy said, "Oh, this is the second time he's been here today." Do you know how if feels to have those words sound when they are spoken directly to your face by the Asian Bistro Delivery Guy?!? He made me sound like a pig, that's what it feels like. It's extremely offensive is what it is! That's not how you want your delivery guy to make you feel! See if I order from the Asian Bistro again! See if I ever open this door again!! See if I ever give you a tip again, Mister Mouthy!!! Okay, okay, so maybe I gave him the same amount of tip I always give him. I didn't go completely crazy. He does control my main food source. What's that saying..."don't bit the hand that feeds you." So, I tipped the guy and swore up and down it wasn't me, but I'm still not sure he really believed me. 

Then yesterday Mona was at my parents house (we crash there all of Shark Week, because we are too cheap to pay for Discovery Channel) and she messages Becky and I on our Facebook Biffs chat:

Mona: "Oh you are at a different house today" Be proud, not ashamed, Mona!!! HE KNOW ME! My response "I'm not afraid, to eat Asian. Everyday of my life"

Becky: What? Are you talking to yourself again?

Mona: No. That is what the delivery guy said "different house today"

Becky: Ohhhh lol embarrassinggg...

Mona: No.

Me: At least you're unforgettable. Too bad it's not that first super cute one that remembers you. (I’m ashamed to admit I know exactly what delivery guy she is referring to)

Mona: That would be worse. I couldn't handle that.

Me: You’re right. You would probably stop ordering Asian takeout if that happened.

Becky: That’s impossible! You wouldn't give up Asian takeout!

Me: You underestimate her awkwardness with the opposite sex.

Mona: Thank you Luna.

So, you may say he knows us a little to well if he recognizes Mona outside of our home. Honestly, I think he sees Mona more than I see Mona. Oh, I wonder if she stared dating him we could get free Asian Bistro? I mean we'd at least get a discount, right? At the very least we'd get our two dollar delivery charge waved. 

SHARK WEEK!

People, do you know what this week is?!? If you can't tell from the title and picture of this post....it's SHARK WEEK!!

If you have never heard of SHARK WEEK you have obviously been living under a rock since July 17, 1987 (Wow! I had to look that date up on Wikipedia. SHARK WEEK is old). I believe the title is self explanatory, but being Captain of the Obvious, I will explain. SHARK WEEK is an entire week, created by Discovery Channel (that part may have been a little less obvious), dedicated to the awesomeness that is all things sharks! Anyone who's anyone knows, loves, and constantly anticipates SHARK WEEK. It was created to raise awareness and respect for the majestic species, and I will have to say Discovery Channel has accomplished and exceeded it's goal. Well done, Discovery Channel, well done.

There is only one problem with it being SHARK WEEK this week. A few weeks ago, due to financial distress, I had to cut my cable to basic TV.

Discovery Channel is not included in my AT&T U-verse basic television package.

My roommate/sister, Mona, was very distraught when she found this information out. A few choice words and lots of anger were thrown in my direction, but sadly no money, so there was nothing I could do.

After Mona and I spent some time crying, we dried our eyes, stopped the hateful words directed all at luna, and rallied together to find a solution to our massive problem. After a little brainstorming we found the answer that would solve all of our problems.

We are now setting up camp in my parents living room.

My parents are taking the unexpected invasion of their children in stride. My mother is cooking and doting on us and my father is making comments under his breath about how he thought he was rid of us when we moved out (my parents have been responding very differently to the "empty nest").

Mona and I shall see if we can last the whole week without being kicked out of the house. Mona uses this annoying uncontrollable laugh every time she sees the commercial that says "It's a bad week to be a seal", so our chances of succeeding are very slim. But with what I've learned this week so far (and it's only Tuesday mind you), it's a shark-eat-shark world out there (literally) and we have to do what we have to do to survive.

HAPPY SHARK WEEK!