How To Get Ready When You Wake Up Late

MY ALARM CLOCK DID NOT GO OFF THIS MORNING!!

Or I didn't hear it, but either way I'm blaming the clock.

We've had this little back and forth going on for awhile, where he tries to not go off and make me late for work and I have to outsmart him by setting other alarms.We used to only play twice a year, daylight savings time, but he's branching out and trying to catch me off guard.  (I am also starting to think he was responsible for the water incident back in December)

Little did he know, when he didn't go off this morning, that I had my "Leave the House Now" alarm set on my cell phone. He's never heard it before because I'm normally downstairs, with the phone, when it goes off.

6:38

That's my "Leave the House Now" time.

I had until 7 to get ready, drive 10 minutes (more if I get caught at stoplights) across town, and clock in for work.

I threw on my clothes from yesterday, bolted over to the upstairs bathroom and stuffed my toothbrush in my mouth as I put deodorant on and ran down the stairs.

I grabbed my makeup bag from the downstairs bathroom and spit my toothpaste out in the sink. My hair was in a ponytail at the top of my head, I could fix that in the car at a stoplight.

Out of the bathroom and to the front door to quickly donned my winter gear. Yesterday it was a sunny and warm 20 degrees, so I was hoping I wouldn't need to bundle up as much as usual, but when I walked out the front door, with my purse, makeup bag, and keys in hand, it was not a warm 20 degrees, it was -15. I hate Wisconsin's temperature range during the winter. It makes it hard to adjust.

I nearly froze to death as I scraped the ice off my car's windows, so I could see to drive. Once I cleared the car I got in I drove the 10 minutes across town, fixing my hair at one of the stoplights i finally made it to work. My fingers had finally defrosted from my outdoor escapades and I had to go back out. I rushed into the building to clock in. As soon as I was in I made a mad dash for the bathroom to pee and put on my make-up. With one last look over myself, thinking I look pretty good for the time allotted, I made it out to my desk with a minute to spare.

You will pay for this one Alarm Clock. You will pay!

Ice Cold Wake Up Call

Monday was my first day free of dogs!

On Monday night I was so excited not to have to wake up in the middle of the night (5:00 AM) to get up and let the dogs out. 

And by let the dogs out I don't mean open the door and let them go out. 

I mean, these people have a fully fenced in back yard and, on top of that, an electric fence to make it even more secure AND THEY STILL WANT ME TO GO OUTSIDE AND ACTUALLY WATCH THE DOGS SO THEY DON'T RUN AWAY!! Guys this is December in Wisconsin, it wasn't warm. It was ridiculous. 

So, again, I was excited not to have to be up at five in the morning standing outside in the cold. I had set my alarm for 6 (had to be to work by 7). I had taken a shower the night before, so when the alarm went off I decided to hit the snooze button for another 30 minutes. It was so nice. I had a smile on my face as I quickly turned to lay back down and drift back into a peaceful slumber. 

I guess I turned to quickly because I ended up with ...

A FULL GLASS OF ICE COLD WATER ON MY HEAD!! 

Talk about a freezing cold wake up call! 

I had set a tall glass of water on my headboard the night before and had knocked it over...right onto me.

I've always seen people being awoken this way in the movies, but I always thought "Oh, that wouldn't be so bad!"

I don't admit this often, but I WAS WRONG.

It was terrible!

But you know it actually works! It wakes you up and it's hard to go back to sleep because EVERYTHING is wet, not just your face like it shows in the movies. I was drenched, my pj's were wet, my pillows were soaking, and my mattress was a sopping mess! 

So much for peacefully sleeping in! I don't think I'll ever put my water on my headboard again. 

The Alarm Clock Games

Daylight savings is kicking my butt!

You get all nice and comfortable. Your internal clock can almost wake you up naturally.

Then someone makes you change your stupid clocks by an hour!

You wouldn't think that an hour would make that much difference, but it feels like I packed up and move to the other side of the world!

It's already Wednesday and I'm still not adjusted. I hate it.

My alarm clock hates daylight savings too.

I change my clock Saturday night before I go to bed and I get up Sunday without a hitch, but then comes Monday. The clock hates Mondays.

I set my newly adjusted alarm clock to the time I need to get up and fall asleep expecting it to work properly. Just like every other day of the year, just like yesterday.

But Monday comes and I wake up to find my clock has decided to jump an extra hour!

Every daylight savings Monday, without fail, for the past three years.

I wake up and find I'm either ready for work by 4 AM before I realize what happened or I'm running around like a mad fool trying not to be late for work.

Three years of this!!!

I have this unrealistic expectation that maybe this time it will be the right time. I quadruple check the alarm clock before I go to bed and go to sleep, fully putting my trust in this little clock that has failed me time and time again.

For awhile I was positive I was so paranoid about waking up at the right time and not being late for work, that I changed it in my sleep.

But it's far to coincidental for it to happen this many times without fail.

I'm not that reliable, even in my dreams.

I'm thinking that somehow it's set to change at daylight savings time, but it's calendar is off by a day. I'm just not sure how to fix it.

I should look into getting a new alarm clock, but now I'm kind of attached to it and this little game we play twice a year.

I proud to say that this was the first time I won the game and beat the alarm clock! I had to bring in my ringer and set a different alarm, but I did it!

I AM SMARTER THAN THE ALARM CLOCK!!