Thursday, December 5, 2013

My Arranged Marriage

I think all this Wedding Doll stuff is going to Mom's head. I got a pin from her today. The pin was sent to Mona and I. This pin was a wedding dress she found online and wanted us to look at. Both of us are 100% single with no hope of that changing any time in the foreseeable future.  

I of course had to say something about this on Facebook. 

Here is the conversation that took place:

My mother is pinning wedding dresses to me and Mona. Do you think she is trying to say something?
Top of Form
Like ·  · Share · 2 hours ago · 

16  like this.
Kari  Yes. That is exactly what she is doing. about an hour ago · Unlike · 1

Luna What is she trying to say Kari? about an hour ago · Like

Kari  She would you and or Mona to get married and wear one of the dresses that she has graciously chosen for you. I don't know how to better spell it out for you. about an hour ago · Like

Kari *she would LIKE. It is clearly bed time. about an hour ago · Like

Luna Well go to bed...you are going to have to help me find a groom to go with my dress tomorrow. about an hour ago · Like

Kari Dress first. Grooms later. about an hour ago · Like

Luna And to think I'd had it backwards all these years! about an hour ago · Like

Kari Silly Luna. about an hour ago · Like

Kayla You said you need a groom???? Lol about an hour ago via mobile · Like · 2 (this girl has been trying to set me up with Charles for years)

Luna  NO Kayla. You are not allowed to help. about an hour ago · Like · 2

Becky Give us 8 hours tomorrow and you will have your groom about an hour ago via mobile · Like · 1

Luna No, no. I'm fine with just the dress for now. And I have already banned you and Kayla from "helping" me find a guy. about an hour ago · Like

Luna you have been officially banned since the incident at the Christmas party last year. about an hour ago · Like · 1 (last year Becky tried to set me up with a guy at her Christmas party by begging me to go because she didn't have a date.)

Mom Check it out...its gorgeous!

http://www.bridaydress.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/869d4aa70f18ed8248180ceb03d1140c/g/o/gossamer-02.jpg

Miss Groom I'm a Groom! Just not the kind you're looking for. Har har har. ...I'm so lame. about an hour ago via mobile · Unlike · 2

Luna You'll do in a pinch Miss about an hour ago · Like · 1

Mom Here is a groom
http://newwonderfulphotos.blogspot.com/2013/10/lol.html
about an hour ago via mobile · Like · 1

Luna Mother I shudder to think what you think of me by sending me these highly offensive pictures! about an hour ago · Like

Heather Character is what is most important. There could be a really big heart behind those thick glasses. about an hour ago · Unlike · 2

Heather Actually, Luna. I am on your side. I was just playing the devil's advocate so you could improve your arguments a bit. ;p  Here's an encouraging video. Stay strong! 
I'll shut up now. 53 minutes ago · Unlike · 3 · Remove Preview

Mom I loved your first response heather!!!!! 46 minutes ago via mobile · Like · 1

Luna That video did make me laugh Heather That would probably be me. 46 minutes ago · Like · 1

Richard I want to join this thread, but fear my gender being taken advantage of. I love wedding dresses. My fav, a little steampunk/victorian sci-fi flare:
http://daestwen.deviantart.com/art/Steampunk-Wedding-Dress-Revamp-158584835
Someone ended up actually making it, but I couldn't find a link right now. 31 minutes ago via mobile · Unlike · 1 · Remove Preview

Luna all these wedding dresses make me feel like I'm being set up for an arranged marriage. Haha 27 minutes ago · Like

Luna it's a cool idea for a wedding dress Richard 23 minutes ago · Like

Heather  Is your issue with the arrangement or the marriage? 22 minutes ago · Like

Mom I could organize that if you would like 21 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Richard  I'm just here for the dresses. 20 minutes ago via mobile · Unlike · 1

Heather  I can actually connect you with a number of professional matchmakers. It would be good for them to have something to do. Something besides thinking about me anyways.... 20 minutes ago · Unlike · 1

Vivian  Yes! It's what mothers do! 20 minutes ago · Like

Mom And Vivian we do it well! 16 minutes ago via mobile · Like · 1

Luna since you're all planning. This is the dress I really want
http://community.babycenter.com/post/a32006343/so_ugliest_wedding_dress
15 minutes ago · Like · 1

Luna with a train just a little longer than this...
http://www.suhana.com/blog/ugly-wedding-dresses-in-action.html
13 minutes ago · Like · 1

Heather Good! You may as well get it fitted. At the rate these minds are whirring, prince Charming will be along shortly. 12 minutes ago · Like

Luna just let me know when and where to show up

Mom I love your dress honey 15 minutes ago via mobile · Like

Luna Thanks ma 14 minutes ago · LikeBottom of Form


Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Pillow Fight

Elf vs Pillow
Pillow Fight (Xmas 2013)

Elf Fishing

It may be disturbing to most, with the tiny face, rosy cheeks, and creepy smile, but I like him all the more for it.

Yes sir, it's...

ELF ON THE SHELF!!

My family started doing this last year. We do it as a competition to see who is the best.

Santa on a Mantel (Xmas 2012)
This year we are doing three elfs (that doesn't sound right) a week. We tired to do it everyday last year, but we gave up way before Christmas because we are lazy.

We are also cheep. Last year, instead of Elf on the Shelf, we did Santa on a Mantel (if you say it just right it almost rhymes). ------>

This year Mom found some knock off elves for us to use this year, but don't think Santa is going to be left out all year...he's going to make an appearance or two.

Even with the Elf I am going to have an exceptionally hard time this year because I am dog sitting.

I'm not at my apartment and therefor I don't have any of my arts and craft supplies.

I can hardly find a piece of tape in this house!

Plus, it's hard to get REALLY creative when your afraid of an explosion ruining their upholstery.

I will just have to make do.

Elf Fishing (Xmas 2013)
First up this year for Mr. Elf is FISHING!

Mr. Elf isn't much for ice fishing this time of year in Wisconsin (it's way colder than the North Pole), so he went fishing for gifts instead!

Much better than fish if you ask me.

Next up we have pillow fighting! 

Any genius idea's are welcome. I'm thinking something with nunchucks.... 

(P.S. While I am going to terrify you and show you all of my creepy Elf on a Shelf pictures, I am not going to make all of my posts revolve around him this month. If I did that, I would be bored out of my mind.

 I haven't decided if I'm going to have a separate post for Mr. Elf or if he's just going to pop up in random posts to frighten you. You shall have to wait and see!)

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

The Planet of Hobbies

So you remember the other day when I was helping my coworker look for a new hobby?

Well I decided that, since I don't do enough with my life, I'm going to try and do a new hobby or project every month! 

I want to try things like putting ships in a bottle and whittling. Who knows I could be really good at stuff I would never think to try. I could be the next...[insert some well known person who is the best at something]. I couldn't think of anyone, but you know what I mean. 

This month I am going to write the first draft of a book. I've already got the first chapter done! The working title is The Planet and lucky you, I am going to share it with you today! 

Remember...this is just a rough draft. Let me know what you think!

The Planet 

Feelings are a weakness
A lost deep art
One we do not have the pleasure of experiencing
If we feel we would crack into a million pieces.
They train us not to feel. Not break, not to think, but to act.
It’s the only way we survive.

-----------------------------------------------------------

We are humans invading the planet Asure because planet earth is crumbling under the weight of our humanity.

We discovered Asure twenty five years ago, ten if you ask the history books. Found a mere 5.8 billion km past the plutoid dwarf planet Pluto. The histories stated Pluto used to be considered a full blown planet. If they only knew what lay in the seemingly dark vastness just beyond, they would laugh at the idea of this small rock being a planet.

Four times the size of planet Jupiter with a similar atmosphere of earth at 30,000 feet above sea level.

It is the closest we have ever come to a habitable planet next to earth.

They started recruiting cadets five years into the project. Quest recruits were chosen young, so they would be able to survive the long journey and make it to the planet still strong enough to survive the thin atmosphere and hard rocky terrain.

Orphans and fosters were chosen in secret. Hidden from public knowledge to avoid protests and program shutdowns.

I was one of the first children drafted. A young boy at the age of five. I always found that poetic and thought myself as old as the planet Asure as we read the history of it’s true discovery. Years later I understood the planet was much older than my mere human years, but part of me will always hold on to that connection. My own private rebellion against the rules of independence.

They found me on the streets of Chicago, a tough kid, covered in dirt and grim. No parents to be heard of, I don’t remember ever having them. All I remember is the streets. They picked me up just as I was about to stab another boy for stealing a loaf of my bread.

I thought they were the police come to take me in for almost stabbing that boy, but instead of prison, they took me to The Facility and cleaned off the dirt, buzzed my long greasy black hair to get rid of the lice, gave me new clothes, fed me, and offered me the adventure of a lifetime. They said it would be hard, but worth it.

Honestly, they could have won me over with the food alone.

It was a tough program, but it suited me well. Anything was better than fighting for your life on the crowded streets of Chicago. There was hardly enough food for those with money, let alone the poor homeless kids on the street. To find a place that had enough food to go around was a miracle.

I dove right into the program and loved every minute of it.  

The training made me fall in love with the planet, Asure. It was so different from the harsh cruel world of earth. They said earth used to be a better place to live, but with the surging population growth, resources were slim and people were willing to do anything to survive.

Training made me feel disconnected from earth almost like this was the alien planet and Asure was my true home. One that I need to get back to at all costs.

Human contact was limited to survival exercises, Asure history and geography lessons, and basic rocket science and ship maintenance.

They were all individual classes. One on one with our teachers. We all knew there were other kids in our training program. We would see them walking down the halls and in and out of classrooms before and after us, but there were no interactions involved or allowed.  
There has only been one time I broke the no interaction code.

I was walking along the white washed training hallways unsupervised. I was around age 12 and was the ranking officer, so I was allowed to walk to and from classes by myself. One of the heavy steel classroom doors banged loudly from the inside. A shrill scream piercing the corridor. I was caught completely off guard and jumped out of my skin. My cheeks flushed in embarrassment, at the thought of anyone seeing my indiscretion. No one gets caught off guard.

The screaming continued as I regained my composure and creeped closer to the door, my eyes flashing up and down the hallway to make sure no one was watching me.

I was about to press my ear to the door to see if I could make out anything amongst the screams when the door burst open. Before I knew what was happening a flurry of flailing arms and hair crashed into me, toppling us both to the floor. I looked up to see a young female jr. office laying on top of me. Her breathing was heavy and there was anger and fear in her eyes.

“Is everything alright officer?” I asked as she lay on top of me, staring at me with her terrifyingly beautiful blue eyes. I knew I shouldn’t be asking questions, but I couldn’t help myself.

She quickly leaned in closer to me, pushing her cheek into my jaw and her lips right up to me left ear and frantically whispering, “Jayden, you must get out! Don’t let them take you, Den! They’re lying to you! They’re lying to us all!”

What did she mean, who was she running from, and how did this girl, who I’ve never met before,  know my name?

Before I could get any of my questions out the door behind us banged again and the girl shot up like a fox and ran down the corridor. My eyes followed after her.

A loud shot rang out from behind me, hissing loud as it flew over my head. The girl hitched, let out one last piercing scream, and fell face down, dead on the floor.

The lights flickered as I stare at her motionless body. Her white dress pooling blood red down her back and spilling onto the white tiled floor.

All this happening in mere moments.

I’ve learned about blood and death and I’d even seen cadavers in my studies before, but never anything like this. Nothing could prepare a person for this.

“Officer Jayden.”

A stern voice called from behind me. I startled at the sound and turned to look at the source of the girls fear, the source of the bullet, the source of her death. I stiffened in fear as I stared at the man dumbfoundead. He was one of the tactical professors. We didn’t have names for them, but this one was in charge of all the junior officers lessons. I remember him from my junior year.

When I didn’t speak his face grew angry and he yelled “Don’t you have lessons Officer or do I need to I need to report you to the board and get your privileges revoke!”

I swallowed hard, my adam’s apple bobbing up and down as I cleared my throat, “No, Sir. I was just on my way Sir.”

I stood up and walked past the man, away from the girl lying on the floor, and to my classroom. Just before I turned the corner I looked back. The Professor was turning over the girls body. Her eyes still open warning me once again to get away.

The incident with the girl haunted me for months afterwards. I knew I could never ask about what happened or the same would happen to me. I was taught never to question authority.

I kept a sharp eye out for awhile to see if I could discover what the girl was talking about, but this was the only life I’ve known. The only one I could imagine. Nothing seemed wrong to me.  I kept my nose down and followed the rules and did what I was told. I figured the girl must have done something terrible to deserve her fate and the professor was just doing damage control and protecting us all from her. She may have seemed helpless, but who knows what was really happening. Eventually the girl faded from my memories and was forgotten altogether.

I didn’t heed her words that day, but I should have.

---------------------------------------------

Well That's all folks! What do you think? Anything you hate or love about it ? Anything you would change, fix? Let me know!!