The Back Up Plan

Mona: Can we get a tour bus?

Me: Sure! That would be great! I was thinking the other day that if you died I would become a legitimate gypsy, so a tour bus would be a good investment.

Mona: Huh, a gypsy...? Only if you take me with.

Me: You mean like your ashes?

Mona: Yeah and you can sprinkle a little bit of me in every place you go.

Me: Okay. Our first stop would probably be Austria to visit Tammy. That way we have some place to stay and won't cost so much money.

Mona: Sounds like a good plan. I'll do the same if you die first. Just promise me one thing...

Me: Yes?

Mona: Promise me you'll find true love. I'll make it part of my will.

Me: Um, okay. That will insure I get your millions of dollars.

Mona: Can you see if I put that in and years from now, when you are already married, I tell you to find love to get my money.

Me: I'd tell my husband I have to go out and find my true love, because Mona obviously thought you weren't it.

Mona: Your poor husband.

Me: So when you die I will travel the earth spreading your ashes and looking for my true love. Sounds like a great plan!

Mona: Sorry I'm holding you back...

Me: I'd rather stay here with you.

Vacation Time!!!!

Right now I really should be getting on a plane headed for Italy, but sadly I am not.

Don't be too sad about it Mona and I chose this. We decided to be responsible and not waste money on a trip to Italy when we are trying to open a coffee shop, so instead we bought this for half the price.

I would have told you sooner, that the trip was canceled, but the news was rather anticlimactic. Mona and I were in our room. Mona sat on her bed and I was in the chair across the room. She had just written out the check for our first payment. She held the check in her hands staring down at it. Staring at the sheer amount of it and considering the ramifications of sending it out. "Do we really want to spend this much money on a trip when we are trying to open a coffee shop?" she asked me. I stared at her and the check. I knew she was right. I had been having the same feelings about the trip for the last week, but I had yet to voice it or accept it. "Probably not," I replied to her with a sigh of disappointment.

We talked about all the pros and cons of going to Italy and the cons eventually won out.

Mona dramatically  ripped the check into little pieces and symbolically threw it in the air like confetti. Okay, so maybe the confetti throwing didn't really happen...she might have just set it on the bookshelf next to her, but now that I'm thinking about it she should have thrown it in the air! It would have made for a much better story. This is why it was so anticlimactic and I didn't write about it! She just sent it on the bookshelf and we moved on with our lives. It's all Mona's fault! If she would have just thrown the ripped up check in the air we would have gotten a proper post. Thanks a lot Mona! So, to make this story better, let's just pretend there was a metaphorical confetti throwing. The falling of paper pieces like the falling away of one dream to make way for a better dream. Like the death and rebirth of a Phoenix. Very poetic and beautiful!

So, back to my main point, even though I'm not going to Italy I'm still taking the time off.

We are heading up to Northern Wisconsin, and by Northern Wisconsin I'm talking about the Green Bay area. Any farther North and that's practically Canada. I live about 30 minutes from the Wisconsin/Illinois border, so that far north would surly insure some sort of culture shock.

I've got my bags packed (which that in itself is a major accomplishment seeing as of 11:00 last night I had absolutely no clean laundry or motivation) and I'm ready to hit the road...that is as soon as I'm done with work. The countdown is at 2 hours and 30 minutes. It's nice to know I won't have to be back here for a week and a half!

Since this vacation is to a place void of a wireless or plug in internet connection and Mona is trying to get me to go on a social media fast (I have agreed to no such thing), I'm not sure how much you will be hearing from me in the next week or so...you never know I might be bored out of my mind or have so many hilarious things I want to tell you that I'll write double the posts from normal, but I highly doubt I'll be bored, so it's more likely you won't hear much from me.

So, if you don't hear from me just think of me sipping espresso on a pier by the lake reading a good book and soaking up the sunshine with a content smile on my face.

The Tale of Twenty Photos

Yesterday, I was going through a bunch of old pictures on my phone and it brought back some good memories and nostalgia, so I thought I would share some of my pictures and stories with you!! 

1. For my 24th birthday Mona and I took a last minute trip to Maine (this was before I started blogging otherwise I would have told you about it). This is Mona with the Portland Head Light Lighthouse in the background. 

2. This is an old army base in Maine, they had it all locked up, but it was cool to walk around and look at all the in the old buildings. Obviously, someone broke into this one and redecorated. 

3. Same army base. This is Mona sitting in one of the old gun holders? Is that what you would call them? There is a big hole with stairs and they used to put big guns in the hole, so "gun holder" makes sense? It's a cool picture...we'll just leave it at that. 

4.Mona and I were a little concerned when we came upon this Culver's, I think it was in the Green Bay or Appleton area? We wanted to know why were we in danger? Turns out it was only a water main break, another restaurant that was still open and using bottled water let us know.

5. Mona and I took some time to do a fancy lake snow art. What that means is we went on the ice, that was frozen and covered with snow, and made art! Here is a house! Mona is trying to get in the door. I think she wants to join the fishes! (That may have sounded like a death threat...I just want to clarify that it is not)

6.  This is how I watch ALL sporting events on television. Reading a book. I'm a HUGE sports fan...not. 

7. This is Mona in fear for her life. We were walking out a long pier in Sheboygan, WI off of Lake Michigan to get to a lighthouse at the end. It was rather windy and the waves were pretty high. She was so afraid of the crashing waves knocking her off the pier that she hit the deck and held on for dear life. She survived.

8. My Cousin with a View-Master. Need I say more? 

9. This is the gear shaft for a revolving jail! My family was on our way to or from Nashville and I saw this museum in the hotel guide. I told them I refused to leave until we went. Mom wasn't enthralled with the idea, but I refused to budge. And it was awesome! They put prisoners in this big room with a round cage separated into different cells that had only one door in or out that opened to only one cell at a time. The jailers would turn the crank to open it to the prisoner they were looking for. They used this concept for added security. Unfortunately, revolving jails are no longer in use because they were deemed a fire hazard and because too many prisoners were losing limbs and heads when the jail would rotate and they had body parts sticking out of the bars. I love weird Museums. I've been trying to talk Mona into going to an old psyche hospital Museum in Indiana, that is supposedly haunted, but for some reason she keeps saying no. 

10. Creepy little children statues I found in my grandmother's basement that reminded me of the Weeping Angles from Doctor Who. Let's say I walked out of there backwards without blinking.  

11. PIRANHA! Mona is terrified of fish. Like crazy terrified. I have a goldfish and she can hardly walk past his tank. So naturally I made her go to an Aquarium. I don't remember for sure where it was, it was either Ohio or Indianapolis or St. Louis...? She was doing okay until we hit the piranha tanks. She hated the piranha tanks. After seeing them sit still in the dark tank ready, not moving, ready to attach at any moment, one of the creepiest things she had ever seen.  She said, and I quote per her request,

"Every fish has a little Piranha in them."  

Yes, Mona, my goldfish could rip the flesh off you at any moment. 

12. Last year when I went to leave our apartment one morning I found a snowman left on our front porch (see picture on left). This was right after the Doctor Who Snowman Christmas Special, so obviously thought it was the Great Intelligence at work!  I went around telling everyone it was a Doctor Who Snowman (see right) that it was after me! Nobody seemed to believe me. 

13. The is from the time my friend Kate asked Becky and I to go with her on a date. She had met the guy on an online dating site, but she was worried about getting kidnapped and murdered, so she wanted us to tag along and call the police if anything fishy happened. Becky and I jumped at the opportunity! Mona pouted, because she had to work. 

The date was at a woodworking convention in Milwaukee. BEST DATE EVER!! At least for Becky and I, Kate didn't like it so much...I mean just look at the distance between the two of them!

After a while Kate made a dash to the bathroom, we followed see if she needed us to come to her rescue. She was ready for the date to be done. Little did we know that Becky's sister, who showed up moments before to join the fun, was talking to the poor guy. He was telling her that on his last online date the girl went to the bathroom and just never came back. She offered to go check on his date for him she felt so bad for him. We didn't let Kate just ditch him through the bathroom window, we made her man up and go tell him it wasn't going anywhere. Then we went out for margaritas. 

14. A lovely poem I wrote with magnets we got from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I'm not quite sure where "cowbell" fits in, so just use your imagination. 

15. My baby, Minnow, sitting at the table drinking coffee. She takes after me with her love of coffee! It's hard to get a good picture of what she really looks like...from here you would think she is a black lab, but this is not the case. She may have the body of a black lab, but she has the legs of a basset hound. She basically looks a giant winner dog. Some people call her weird looking and then I never talk to them again. 

16. This is what it looks like when you drive on highways surrounded by cornfields in the middle of a Wisconsin winter. Not cool Wisconsin. Dad wanted me to send this picture to Mom as we were driving, but I told him I wasn't crazy! I will show her when the snow is gone. Well, the snow is gone so here you go Mom! Good news...we survived without incident or else you would have heard by now. 

17. This cool looking spider Mona found hidden in her clothes in the basement. Mona didn't like it so much at the time...well actually she still doesn't like it, she almost threw up when I just showed her this picture. Way to hold a grudge. 

18. Awesome homemade French waffles! Mom has this group going where a bunch of people make French recipes and share pictures on Facebook every month. I told her I wouldn't do it, because who wants to cook that often? But a bunch of my friends got together to do it together, so it was okay. And, like I said, they were awesome.  

19. My green thumb at work. Sadly the winter was not kind to my poor plants...nor was the summer. I think it was just because Mona kicked them over..look at that dirt on the ground! That was from the pots!

 Still, I just don't seem to have a way with plants. I've even managed to kill a cactus before, so I don't know why I think I can grow a more delicate plant. I try the set it and forget it method when it comes to gardening...it doesn't always (or never) work. But every year I keep trying...

Is plant homicide illegal? 

20. One day last summer, Mona and I decided that we were going to become birdwatchers. We downloaded a bird app, dressed in our outdoors like gear, went and bought binoculars, and stopped at Starbucks (you can't go bird watching without coffee). This picture was the result of our excursion. Do you know how hard it is to be a birdwatcher?!? Trying to look through those tiny binocular holes while locating the bird you just saw with your real eyes is VERY difficult. Plus it's hard to hold coffee and look through binoculars at the same time. Once Mona was done with her coffee she put the Starbucks cup on the end of the walking stick she picked up...as you can see from the picture. We were out watching for hours. We had a blast and basically become bird watching experts and then we never went bird watching again. 

Good times.

Italy In Transit

Italy.

This May. 

Yes, please!

I was planning on not planning a trip or vacation this year to save money.

Then, last week, an amazing opportunity came up for me to go to Italy on a volunteer trip this May.

At first I was like, "ABSOLUTELY!" 

Then I was like, "No Way! I can't afford to go to Italy and I probably won't be able to get time off from work."

Then Mona was like, "Don't be an idiot, this is Italy!" 

Winter Palace of the Bogd Khan

Last time I was able to go on a trip like this was quite a few years ago. I traveled to Asia to teach English as a second language in Mongolia. I loved everything about it! The culture and the people I met were amazing!

 I stayed in the capital Ulaanbaatar. We saw the Winter Palace of the Bogd Khan and the Zaisan Memorial which was surrounded by poles covered in blue rags to bring good luck to those who tired them. 

I've been crammed into a taxi car with ten people and survived their insane traffic. 

We rode Mongolia horses across the grassy mountains and flew over the Gobi Desert. 

I've listened to Mongolia throat singers and was entertained by contortionists. 

Gher in Mongolia

I drank Airag, fermented mare's milk (an acquired taste), and shopped at the Naran Tuul Market (the black market). 

I've been inside a Gher and even learned to speak a few words in Mongolia.

But, I have to say, my favorite thing about this trip was the people, the Mongolians.  My favorite memory is when our bus broke down on the way to the country. We all sat, Americans and Mongolians, on a grassy hill beside the road with smiles on our faces, laughing and joking, as we waited for the bus to be repaired. The connections I made there, with these people,  I will never forget. I will never forget these people. 

I will never forget this trip.

How could I not jump at the opportunity to do something like that again?

Then I was like, "You're right, Mona, I'm in!" 

I put in my time off slip yesterday. 

My bosses are still doing all of the other employees priority vacation time (which I missed the deadline by a few days), so I will have to wait a while. But according to one of my bosses the middle of May (the trip is the 8th-20th) wasn't looking too bad for getting my request approved! 

FINGERS CROSSED!!

Will all this travel talk, what has been your favorite traveling experience? 


{update: moments after hitting the publish button of this post, my boss came up with my vacation request slip. I was APPROVED!! They even drew a little picture of Italy on the paper!! I LOVE MY BOSSES!! ITALY HERE I COME!!}